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Saturday, March 20, 2010

Day 11

Truth. That's what we all want, right? Even if we think we can't handle the truth, we long for it. I do. A friend of mine is a hard core atheist. He's a brilliant man and one of the kindest, most giving people I've had the pleasure of knowing.
Once, he came into the studio at the radio station where we both worked and said something like, "Oh Shannyn, one of these days you're going to wake up and be the pagan that I know your really are."
"We respect each other, right?", I said.
"Yes we do."
"Well than I'm gonna need you to respect the fact that I am a Christian and I follow Jesus. You cannot respect ME if you do not respect Jesus in me. It's the most important part of who I am. Are you good with that?"
"Sure, wow." he said.

See, if you boil me down, I'm nothing but a sinner saved by the grace of the highest expression of Gods love for man in the history of time and that is the Lord Jesus Christ.
There it is.
The truth as I KNOW it.

Okay-more truth. After the tornado and before I got saved by Jesus, I found a lot of help and healing in the ancient art and science of yoga.
I know that this may be the place where you decide I'm not a "real" Christian. That hurts more that my Atheist friends judgement. Much more because we are both in the same family and it's the family of the King who loves us and died for us. That said. We all want the truth, at the end of the day and it happens to be the end of the day.

I went to a yoga workshop today with the man who invented the discipline of yoga that I love the most. It's called Anusara and it means "Flowing with grace" in Sanskrit-the most ancient know language.
Interesting, right? Flowing with grace? Anyway...

Anusara is all about opening the heart and it has been very helpful in my healing all along the way to where I am.
Do what you will...but if you ask me, if you are in your healing season, a Christian yoga class may be a very good idea.

The workshop was amazing and at this point, when I check in with my heart, I feel no pain, no brokenness, no void, no emptiness. I feel full of grace.
However, my hamstrings are another story.

The one thing that bothered me at the workshop was the lack of Jesus being represented. He acknowledged many so called deities, but never the most high. Strange.
Also in the workshop was a Christian pastor from Grand Rapids, Michigan and he and I talked and decided that we would be prayer partners that the Lord would send His Holy Spirit to open the eyes of John's (the teachers) heart to the vast truth of the name above all names.

Here are some things that I know from the yogic practice that I believe are directly related to my hearts peace today.

First-Open to grace. In my framework-that means open to the expansive healing and loving power of your Father in heaven who loves you and longs for your wholeness in Him.

Second-Engage. Hug to the middle. In yoga this means drawing you muscles to the bone. It means participating and not just having a "whatever" attitude to how your heart and your life are going. You have a vote. In my Christian framework, this mean, Hug to Christ, who is the center of absolutely everything.

Third-Shine out. Make this movement an offering. In my Christian framework, this means PRAY and shine His light with everything you do.

Another helpful thing to remember is to keep your shoulders on your back. Try it.
Bring you shoulders forward and feel how you heart closes. Now draw them onto you back and see how the horizon of your heart expands. This simple this has kept deep depression at bay for me. Sometimes it's scary because it means being open and vulnerable which means we could get hurt-but if I can't trust opening to grace, than I am strait up sunk.

Father, I thank you that I had the chance to share Jesus with so many people today. I pray that I will always have the chance to share the good news and that I will always have the courage to do it when you guide me to.
Thank you that today my heart doesn't feel pain. I am open to the idea that I can live each day this way. Teach me how to honor the memory of the one's I've lost without grieving them. You are amazing, Lord and all of my hope and trust is in you.
Thanks for being trust-worthy.
I offer my joyful heart to you with gratitude.

Let the peace of God rule in your hearts. Colossians 3:15 NIV

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